The only way I could continue this story is drunk, so here we go...
In October of 2009 I packed my things and moved to work friends home, the very home that was located above a girl from work who cheered me on for my "new life". Make no mistake I knew what was happening, I knew this girl liked me and that my new position would please her. Did I care that I was leaving my children and wife alone to fend for themselves? Apparently not. So I moved out, bought a futon for the living room I would be sleeping in, Went to work, ignored my wife and children, moved on with my so called life.
When I did go back to my family I was a zombie, a shadow of what a father should be. The second my wife came home I was gone. She attempted to spend time with me, offered to watch a movie or even just talk, but I would not have it. Only now do I realize the reason I could not stand to be around her was because I knew the choice I had made was wrong and that I was still very much in love with her.
By mid November I had secured my own apartment with a "friend" from work and was seeing the very girl who told me I needed to move out. We had very little in common and almost never talked about anything of substance and to be honest I was not attracted to her physically, but she told me I was amazing and wanted to be around so I imagined she was someone I needed. In the back of my mind I knew things were unraveling but like everything else I ignored the signs.
It was the beginning of December that I was told my family would be leaving, moving to Colorado with Her parents where there would be support and a home. I pretended to be OK with it, I tried to convince myself everything would be fine and I could stand being so far away. It was on Christmas Eve that I started to come around, removing my head from my ass. I did not get to see my children open their gifts on Christmas Day like I had every year of their lives. I assembled the presents around the tree and waited, I waited for hours, but my wife and children never came home. It was during this time that I started to realize what I had done, and that my life would never be the same.
On Christmas Day, on the porch of what used to be our home, I begged and pleaded. I cried out to her to stay, that I would take care of them, and that I was sorry, but it was not enough.
December 28th 2009 is the night I lost my family. I was on the phone with my wife, begging for her to wait as I sped down the freeway. She was crying, telling me how much she did not want any of this, how much the children were suffering for what was happening. I could hear her parents screaming at her that they needed to leave, screaming swear words about what I had done, and trying to rush her out the door because they knew I was coming. I remember her words so clearly that I shall never forget them, she told her parents in a pained voice that they do not know how hard this is, that she did not want to leave. These words did not stop them from taking my family, and punishing me for all the wrong I had caused.
After that night I would not see my wife and children for an entire month. After that night, everything I once had was gone. After that night my life ended.
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